


Meet me in the pouring rain

by lirs26



Category: K (Anime)
Genre: Fluff, Light Angst, M/M, middle school Sarumi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-29
Updated: 2015-12-29
Packaged: 2018-05-10 07:17:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5576266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lirs26/pseuds/lirs26
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Saruhiko's ready to spend another Christmas Eve huddled up in a corner of the nearest internet café, but an invitation from his closest friend might be all it takes to brighten his day.</p>
<p>(written for Sarumi Secret Santa)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Meet me in the pouring rain

**Author's Note:**

  * For [InmiMarino](https://archiveofourown.org/users/InmiMarino/gifts).



> The story is set when Saruhiko and Misaki are both 14 years old. It’s located between Period 1 and Period 2 of the Lost Small World novel (or between Chapter 5 and Chapter 6 of the manga adaptation).  
> This was my very first time working with middle school Sarumi, but even though it wasn’t easy I really enjoyed the challenge! Also, big thanks to Jen because she endured my random ramblings and messy ideas for almost a month as I tried to write this, and I’m sure this fic wouldn’t have been the same without her help and constant motivation. You’re amazing, thank you so much!! ;u;  
> I’d also like to add that this was part of the Sarumi Secret Santa exchange organized by some people in the fandom and done privately. This is the gift I made for my friend Inmi Marino. One of her wishes was middle school Sarumi spending Christmas together so I tried my best to write something for her! I never actually thought it would reach 11k words.  
> Hope you guys like it!

It was Christmas Eve and Saruhiko was cold.

He sat at the very back of a bus headed towards Shizume City, backpack positioned hastily on the ground by his feet. It was a crisp winter day, and even though he was riding inside the bus there was some asshole two rows ahead of him who had decided he could use some fresh air and deemed it necessary to open the roll up window next to his seat. Saruhiko cursed under his breath as the cold air hit his skin and he couldn’t prevent himself from sneezing a couple of minutes later, gaining a curious stare from an old lady that rode near the front of the bus. It was a quarter past four in the afternoon and he had been stuck riding on the bus for over half an hour, which was only helping the deterioration of his already sour mood. Apparently the bus had gotten stuck in traffic, moving at a much slower pace than Saruhiko was used to – normally he would have reached his destination twenty minutes after getting on said public transport. It wasn’t like he was particularly interested in the place the bus was taking him – he wouldn’t mind sitting on the moving vehicle for longer if it wasn’t for the uncomfortable feeling in his body as he trembled slightly from the cold. There were too many people on the bus as well and although he was used to being alone in the back, that day he’d gotten the unfortunate luck of having the company of two noisy kids who were talking cheerfully about all the presents they’d get for Christmas the following morning.

A few more minutes passed until Saruhiko was finally able to spot the familiar bus stop and with a yawn he got up and slung his backpack over his shoulders, unintentionally stumbling upon one of the kids’ feet as he hurried for the way out before the sliding doors closed. The kids smiled apologetically at him and mumbled a combined “Sorry!” as he turned back to look at them with narrowed eyes.

The air was even colder outside and he shivered as he got off the bus and walked down the road. His breath formed swells of mist with every exhalation and he decided to slide his exposed hands inside his jacket pockets to retain some warmth. It didn’t take long for him to reach the internet café he usually went to when he needed a place to stay the night.

There was a beep as he opened the glass door of the establishment, and he walked over to one of the available tables to sit down. Normally he would have opted for what’s commonly called a ‘closed box’ since he wouldn’t have to deal with stupid idiots and all the noise wavering around the interior of the café - it was always better to have his own space within four walls, cut off from the rest of the world. But there was a red sign near the entrance that said all the individual spaces were occupied for the night. It was to be expected, a lot of people would try to spend Christmas Eve on a closed confinement and the café had offered some of its space to a small number of homeless people in an act of charity related to the holiday season. Thus, the best spot Saruhiko could get for himself was a small table at the far end of the café, next to a smelly man wearing a suit that looked so tight it was possibly strangling him.

Saruhiko sighed at his lack of luck and settled down in the black reclining chair available for him close to the table, dropping his nearly empty backpack on the ground at his feet. Looking around at the space he was occupying, he noticed there was a tiny Christmas tree hastily decorated on top of the table. It was a plastic model-like thing, too simple to even be noticed properly at first, yet it had been placed there with some kind of reason and worthless meaning. Saruhiko clicked his tongue at the dullness of it. Soon enough the holiday season would be over and the toy-like decoration would be discarded somewhere dark until someone deemed it useful again.

Where was the meaning in that? _How pitiful_. Christmas was a ridiculous thing.

One of the staff members came by and asked him if he wished to spend the night there, to which he answered with a nod and the required payment. He also bought a medium cup of coffee for himself, hoping it would be enough to warm him up. The drink was hot as it slid down his throat but its effects weren’t immediate, so he took the thin blanket he’d brought with him out of his backpack to cover himself with. It didn’t help much but it was enough. He was alright.

Saruhiko was used to doing this after all.

It hadn’t been the second or third time he’d done it. His visits to the internet café had become more regular with the ever passing days and most of the staff had started looking at him sideways each time they noticed him entering the establishment, making stupid little comments about how a boy his age shouldn’t go there to spend the night by himself. Misaki had already found out as well - Saruhiko had no particular reason to hide that fact after all - though the redhead didn’t know he had also spent his last Christmas huddled up in a stupid cubicle, fighting the cold and the ever growing darkness that enveloped his body. It had been lonely just like every other time, but there was no fiber in him that regretted doing it because anything was better than spending the holiday in his house and its temporary-like residents.

He’d had too many bad memories of Christmas to last him a lifetime. Memories of fire and laughter, almost hysterically so, of a burnt Christmas tree and packages reduced to ashes, of tears streaming down his face as more bits of his world crumbled when he was only a small child. Saruhiko shook his head, trying to simmer down the dark memories, but flashes of blinding images set themselves before his eyes.

The incident of the burnt Christmas tree, as the people had called it back then, happened four years ago.

It had been another stupid business Christmas party organized by Fushimi Kisa, a party with boring people, boring clothes and stupid formalities. There were waiters waltzing around with trays of food in their hands and the big salon of their house had been filled with all kinds of fancy Christmas decorations. Saruhiko had already gone through enough of those business-like parties at the age of ten to know what to do to keep himself busy, almost like a mechanical process that had been developed over time inside himself and found a permanent place to rest in some corner of his brain. He would just sit quietly on some chair in the farthest corner of the room and play games. That woman wouldn’t want him to go anywhere else. After all, exposing him to a bunch of strangers and business partners wasn’t exactly what she had intended at first, but since they knew of his existence, pretending she had a son she cared about when needed had always been one of her best abilities. Some people even came by sometimes and asked him what he was playing or if he was enjoying the party his loving mother had worked so hard on, to which he never answered, nor lifted his head to greet and acknowledge.

His game had become boring after a couple of hours and the collar of the shirt the new housemaid had forced him to wear felt too tight on his neck. He could sense people staring at him from where that woman stood, tall and ominous, and he clicked his tongue, looking off to the side to see if there was an escape route somewhere. What he hadn’t expected to find though, was a pair of icy blue eyes that matched his surveying the ballroom from the main entrance. There was a chill running down his body as those eyes met his, and Saruhiko felt nauseated.

Fushimi Niki was there.

He shouldn’t have been surprised. After all, they were having the Christmas party at their house and that guy had known about it - even though he had been thoroughly warned not to come.

Saruhiko’s heartbeat had picked up as the man forced himself inside the salon, cigarette in hand. He remembered feeling his legs tremble and the collar of his shirt digging into his neck more painfully than ever. Oh, how painfully human and vulnerable he was.

That guy had gotten close to him in a matter of seconds, humming to the rhythm of whatever song was playing inside his head. When he was right in front of Saruhiko, he smiled through the smoke of his cigarette, malice wavering through those narrowed eyes.

“Merry Christmas Saruhiko~!” he said, and Saruhiko had tried his hardest to ignore him and focus on the game he still hadn’t completed. That guy waved a hand in front of his face and laughed to himself, muttering something about how monkeys weren’t made to play video games. When he approached Saruhiko again, that woman could already be seen walking towards them, probably to scold her husband for smoking inside, or daring to come to the party at all.

“You haven’t opened your gifts yet, right monkey? Want me to go get them for you? Santa must have been really nice this year!” Niki said, teasingly. Before that woman could take him away, that guy was already making his way to the Christmas tree and Saruhiko had merely been left to watch how everything unfolded from then on, eyes widening visibly as that guy tripped over a table cloth and dropped the lit cigarette on top of the exquisitely wrapped presents. It hadn’t taken long before those started to burn, sparks of red moving steadily through the inviting paper. Then it had only been a matter of seconds for the tree to catch fire as well and overall panic settled itself in the ballroom. That guy was still on the floor as confusion settled around him, laughing like a madman and staring back at Saruhiko with nothing but malice in those eyes that resembled his own too much. It had been right there, in that moment, that Saruhiko knew he’d done it on purpose.

It was midnight, Christmas day, and a ten year old Saruhiko stood in the middle of the road hugging himself to fight the seemingly endless amount of shivers rocking his body as the icy air met his skin, breathing heavily through his lungs. There were tears falling down his cheeks - though he tried his best to keep them in - and he couldn’t stop trembling as he watched firemen going in and out of the house he lived in, which was completely consumed by smoke. Fortunately, nobody had been seriously wounded and all that was left of the incident was the burnt up ballroom, filled with ashes of his own crumbled existence.

When Saruhiko finally came back to himself, his breath was forcing its way out of his lungs in messy puffs and he couldn’t control the way his body convulsed with the dark memories, bile rising to the back of his throat. He almost fell out of the chair - his hands were turning white with the effort of holding him in place - but he couldn’t let himself fall down like this, not now. He wasn’t at that house.

_I’m okay_ , he thought to himself, trying to control his breathing. And he kept repeating those words, over and over, like a mantra, stuck on an endless loop inside his own head. As if they could mean anything, as if he wasn’t lying to himself.

_I’m okay, I’m okay, I’m okay, I’m okay, I’m okay, I’m okay_.

In a panicked daze, Saruhiko grabbed the PDA he’d brought in his backpack, dialing the only number he’d ever gotten accustomed to as fast as his shaking fingers would allow him.

The phone ringed once, twice. By the third ring Saruhiko thought he’d better hang up - it was Christmas Eve after all and Misaki should be doing something with his family, there’s no way he’d pick u-

“Saruhiko?”

The voice he heard from the other side sounded all too familiar, interrupting his train of thought, and Saruhiko sighed in relief, pressing the PDA closer to his ear.

“…Saruhiko!” said the voice again, higher this time, and he didn’t know what to answer. He was at a loss of words, too busy lulling himself in the chair, blanket firmly wrapped around his neck like a protective shell built around him.

Why had he called?

A few quiet seconds passed before Misaki tried again.

“Hey. What’s wrong?”

Saruhiko finally answered a quick “Nothing. I’m okay.” and his voice was faint. Too faint, too hoarse. Too weak, coming out of his abused throat that had been contracted for a long time trying to stop any contents from leaving his stomach.

There was a pause on the other side.

“You wanna talk about it?” Misaki asked.

Saruhiko shook his head, though he knew such action couldn’t be seen by the redhead. “No.” He gripped the PDA with a bit more force than he needed to, shifting a bit in the chair so he could bring his knees to his chest. “It’s fine.”

“Right. So you’re trying to tell me the reason you called wasn’t because you actually miss spending time with me?”

For a moment, Saruhiko just blinked at the toy-like Christmas tree in front of him - then he felt his mouth turning up at the corners and there was a small hint of a smile on his face.

“Yeah, yeah. That’s what you’d like to think, right Misaki?” Saruhiko felt part of the tension slip away from his body as he replied in a lighter tone. It was easy to talk like this. Misaki made it easier to breathe. “Besides, we saw each other two days ago.”

“And what if I told you that we could spend the day together today? The rest of it, I mean.” 

At that, the air around him seemed to shift for a second and Saruhiko’s breath got caught up in his throat. “Don’t be stupid, idiot.” he retorted, adjusting his glasses. There was warmth crawling through his blood and he looked off to the side, eyes wide and somewhat hopeful.

A soft chuckle could be heard on the other end of the line. “I’m not the idiot here, idiot. So, what do you say?”

Saruhiko stared at the PDA in his hand for a brief moment, before answering “Alright.” and getting up from the black chair.

* * *

Half an hour later, Saruhiko had his back pressed against the glass door of the internet café, hands stuffed in his jacket pockets. He regretted not bringing a scarf with him - his neck was painfully exposed and it was like the cold outside air ran through his body and hugged his bones, shaking him to the very core. He tried to cover the exposed area as best as he could, having buttoned his jacket all the way up for a change, but his efforts didn’t seem to help the situation, much to his dissatisfaction.

He sighed at the sight of people moving around everywhere, stores full of idiots on a frenzy taking their last chance at buying gifts to give the following day.

_How pointless_ , he thought, taking out his PDA and opening the mailing app he’d made for Misaki and himself in hopes that the redhead had sent him something. There weren’t any new messages. It was fine though, Misaki should be arriving any time soon. Hopefully he wouldn’t take much longer.

Truthfully, a few minutes passed and the familiar ring of Misaki’s bicycle could be heard in the distance, mingled with the Christmas songs coming out from every other store. When Saruhiko turned his head upwards he instantly spotted the other teen coming in his direction, walking down the stairs that led to the café’s entrance to meet him.

Misaki stopped the worn out bike a few feet away from him and got off, holding it by the handle as he walked the rest of the way over to where he stood at the bottom of the shallow stairs.

“I’m here!” the redhead said, smiling up at him with a gleam of excitement in his eyes. Saruhiko looked at the boy in front of him and had to contain a small bubble of laughter that threatened to leave his lips. Misaki was wearing a black beanie and had a long patterned gray scarf wrapped around his neck. He was also wearing a yellow coat that was clearly a few sizes bigger than it should, as it covered all of him almost down to his ankles and his hands were hard to spot due to the long sleeves. The whole outfit put together made him look ridiculous, like a stuffed toy with oversized clothing, but at the same time Saruhiko found it endearing in a strange way he couldn’t quite describe himself.

He decided not to dwell on it much and muttered a quick “You’re late.” instead.

“It wasn’t my fault!” Misaki countered. “Minoru and Megumi wanted to come along with me when I said I was leaving so it was hard to get them off my back. My mom had to make up an excuse, saying I had to go out to buy a couple of missing ingredients for dinner, otherwise those two wouldn’t have let me come.” 

“You could have said something.” 

“I was stuck talking to my mom before leaving so I didn’t really have a lot of time to warn you I’d be late. I did try though!” Misaki held out his PDA with a half written message on it, even though Saruhiko hadn’t really asked to see it. He nodded at the redhead as he finished reading the unfinished message and the former retrieved his PDA and put it back in his coat’s right pocket, still holding on to the handle of his bicycle with his left hand.

“My mom told me it’s okay if I spend the evening with you, as long as I come back home at a reasonable time. She even let me miss out the Christmas Eve dinner, that’s how much she likes you!”

Saruhiko’s expression softened at that. Misaki’s mom was someone who liked to dote on him a lot whenever he came by the Yata residence, patting his head when she had the chance to and fussing over his eating habits every time he stayed for dinner. Most times he’d try to get away by passing his vegetables to an always giggling Megumi, who took them in her tiny hands and stared happily at him as if he’d given her the best thing she could have asked for. Misaki’s mom always noticed, of course, and put a couple more vegetables on his plate, staring at him as he was inevitably forced to eat them one by one. ‘ _Vegetables are good for you_ ’, she’d say, and Misaki would nod fiercely next to her, much to his dismay. She cared about the smallest things and always did her best to make him feel like he was welcome in their house, and Saruhiko couldn’t understand why someone like himself would get fussed over so much by someone who knew close to nothing about him, their only connection being Misaki. It was a weird feeling, and something he didn’t quite get used to yet. Despite everything, Saruhiko had to admit that she was a strangely endearing person, much like her redheaded son.

“So, where do you wanna go?” Misaki asked after a couple of seconds. 

He didn’t really care where they went, so he shrugged. “I don’t know.” The place wasn’t really important as long as they got to spend some time together, just the two of them. Misaki’s eyebrows came together in thought and he stood like that for a while, which wasn’t something he typically did. Saruhiko hit him softly on his arm.

“Don’t hurt your brain with all that thinking.” he said, jokingly. The other teenager looked up at him with a frown. “Can’t we just go somewhere like the gaming center or something?” he suggested.

“But that’s what we always do!” Misaki retorted.

“And is there anything wrong with going today?”

“No… not really. But I wanted to do something different with you!”

Saruhiko was a bit taken aback by that. “Why?”

“Well, it’s Christmas right? I didn’t get you a gift or anything, so I figured we could go somewhere special.” the redhead said with a nervous smile, scratching the back of his head with his left hand. Saruhiko lowered his gaze to the ground, not sure what would be the proper answer to that. He’d never had anything nice to remember when he thought of the word ‘Christmas’, so the fact that Misaki had thought about trying to make it different - trying to make it _special_ \- set his mind on a confusing loop of astonishment and disbelief.

To say he was speechless was an understatement.

“…Saruhiko?” he heard Misaki ask in front of him. He looked up at the other’s hazel eyes and didn’t bother to hide the smile that took over his expression. Misaki’s eyes widened at that and not long after the redhead did the same, baring his teeth and closing his eyes slightly. They must have looked silly to the random passerby, smiling at each other like that with no apparent reason in front of the café, Misaki’s hands still holding on the to handle of his bicycle and Saruhiko still shivering from the cold air hitting his neck, but none of that mattered.

Saruhiko felt like he could finally breathe again. “So, gaming center it is then?” Misaki asked, still smiling as vividly.

He nodded. “There’s a new game we haven’t tried there yet.”

“Alright, onwards we go!”

Everything became easier when he had Misaki by his side, he mused. The world turned a shade brighter when he looked down at that never faltering smile and he’d always somehow find some sparks of the lost hope he had given up on somewhere along the way. Everything felt warmer around Misaki, even though they were walking around outside on one of the coldest days of December.

* * *

Two hours had passed by, and Misaki still hadn’t won a single round.

“Let’s play again! I’ll definitely win this time!”

Saruhiko looked sideways at his noisy friend, a sort of casual satisfaction in his expression. It was always amusing, being able to witness that look of determination in Misaki’s eyes every time another ‘Game Over’ popped up on his half of the screen. The redhead cursed and didn’t even bother looking at him as he pressed the start button and the game came back to its initial setting.

Needless to say, Misaki lost yet another battle.

“So, what did you just say about winning?”

“Shut up! I’m just not in a pretty good form today!”

“I feel like that excuse has become a bit overused by now.” Saruhiko raised his eyebrows slightly and grinned at Misaki, with a wild mix of amusement and smug skepticism.

“Well, it’s my first time playing this game! I’m sure I could beat you if I’d had some more time to practice!” Misaki retorted, turning to him with a frown as he spoke.

“If you think so…”

“Heh, brag all you want! One of these days I’m gonna wipe that grin off your face, Saruhiko!”

“I’d like to see you try.”

At that, Misaki grinned back next to him and pressed the start button once again.

Just as they were about to begin another match, there was a sudden sound - almost like a wild roar of sorts - that seemed to have come from Misaki’s stomach. The redhead shifted next to him, clearly uncomfortable, and what seemed like a blush driven by embarrassment tinged his cheeks red. A few minutes later, when another ‘Game Over’ popped up on his screen, the redhead got up from the chair he’d been sitting on and set his controller on the mini table next to it.

“Let’s go eat something, I’m starving.” Misaki said, grabbing his coat that was thrown haphazardly in the back of the chair. Saruhiko got up as well and followed him, buttoning up his jacket and adjusting his backpack on his shoulders. Misaki had been waiting for him to catch up a few feet ahead and his stomach made another hungry noise when Saruhiko reached him.

With a playful smile, Saruhiko looked at the slightly older teen.

“Eager, aren’t we?” he asked, in a somewhat mocking tone, and Misaki muttered a low tuned “Very funny.” as they passed the gaming center’s main entrance and walked out the rotating door.

Now that they were back outside, Saruhiko shivered involuntarily at the difference in temperature. The icy winter air was hitting his still exposed neck again, which brought a distraught frown to his face. Such action didn’t go unnoticed and Misaki looked at him questioningly for a moment, before shuffling closer to him.

“Are you cold?”

“I’m okay.” grumbled Saruhiko, looking down at the wet pavement they were walking on. Apparently there had been a big downpour when they were at the gaming center that stopped just a couple of minutes before they left. There were still people walking around the streets with dripping umbrellas, certainly afraid of a sudden comeback of the rain that had been pouring so harshly before. Saruhiko wondered if the two of them could make it to their destination without getting wet.

_Feeling cold and wet, what an awful combination_. Saruhiko couldn’t help but shiver at the thought.

“Liar.” Misaki accused. “Don’t think I can’t see you shivering!”

“Even so, I’m okay.”

“Stop lying!”

“I’m not.”

Misaki huffed, clearly irritated. “If you keep doing that, one of these days you’ll end up freezing to death.”

“Well then, if I don’t live any longer than this then that’s okay as well.”

“No, no, that’s not a cool way to die at all!”

“Then what do you suggest I should do? It’s not like the cold’s stopping at any moment because I want it to.”

Saruhiko watched as Misaki stopped walking to look down at the ground with his brows furrowed. He wondered what the redhead would come up with next. Less than a couple of seconds later, Misaki grabbed his scarf and slid it out from around his neck. Holding the patterned gray item in his hand, he extended it in his direction, hazel eyes locking with his own blue ones.

“Take this.” Saruhiko’s hands twitched unintentionally and he blinked at the other’s request. Upon receiving no immediate answer, Misaki pressed the scarf against his chest, eyes determined. He wouldn’t take no for an answer.

But two could play that game.

“Alright.” he agreed and Misaki smiled. “But only if you put it on me.”

The request got the redhead confused for a brief moment, but without giving it much thought he nodded and motioned for him to duck his head.

Saruhiko did as he was asked to, but when Misaki tried to wrap the scarf around his neck he avoided the other’s touch with a swift motion and held his head high with a smirk dancing on his lips.

“Hey, what are you doing?” the other teen asked, suspicion settling itself in his narrowed eyes. He didn’t give out a warning before he tried to wrap the scarf around his neck once more, and Saruhiko moved his head back just as quickly.

“Try to reach me if you can, Misaki.”

Something clicked in the redhead’s eyes. “Is that a challenge Saruhiko? And I told you not to call me by that name when we’re outside!”

Saruhiko didn’t answer, and he didn’t really have to, because Misaki was already moving towards him for another attack. They kept going at it, to the point where they were running down the street chasing each other, stepping over puddles that had resulted from the downpour without a care in the world. That stupid game of tag - or whatever it was that they were doing - ended abruptly when Misaki collided with an old lady by accident, thus receiving a lecture about respecting the elders and watching where he was going, amongst some other boring things. When the old lady ended her speech, Misaki apologized to her and the look in her eyes gave of an ambience of someone who wasn’t satisfied until she got to whack the red haired teenager in the head. As soon as she started making her way to wherever she’d wanted to go, Misaki turned to him and as their eyes met they shared a smile.

It had been silly and unnecessary; after all they’d been running outside with no apparent destination and had gotten further away from the place where they usually stopped by to have some food. But Saruhiko felt warmth spreading in his chest, that sort of weird but not entirely unwelcome feeling he seemed to get whenever he spent time with Misaki.

Saruhiko moved over to where the shorter teen was still standing after colliding with the old woman and finally let the redhead wrap the patterned gray scarf around his neck. It was soft to the touch and it felt comfortable in his hands as he adjusted it; Saruhiko couldn’t have asked for better.

He muttered a low, barely audible “It’s warm.”, content with the fact that his neck was no longer exposed to the biting cold temperatures. Misaki smiled approvingly next to him and Saruhiko could make up a small blush in the other’s cheeks. The older of the two then brought a hand to the back of his head and looked away as they turned around and headed towards their usual fast food restaurant, which was conveniently located close to the gaming center.

Upon getting to the desired establishment, there was a monstrously long line leading to the cashier that made both boys halt in their step. Saruhiko had wanted to give up and just skip dinner entirely, but Misaki held on to him and didn’t let him move – which had been annoying and unnecessary; after all, there were other places they could go to if the redhead was so insistent on eating something. He was forced to accept defeat though, Misaki’s hold on his arm was strong and he didn’t feel like struggling to run away and return to the unsettling cold outside. As a result, the two of them had to stand there waiting in line for almost half an hour until they were able to make their order and sit down to eat their food.

Saruhiko had gotten a cheeseburger for himself, especially made without the pickle slices and the onion bits, along with some fries and a bottle of cola, while Misaki preferred to try out a new burger that had started being advertised recently and looked so cool he’d get hungry whenever he saw the commercial for it on TV - those being his words. Looking at it now, Saruhiko couldn’t see why the other teen had been infatuated with trying that specific burger; it seemed like it was stuffed with a lot of ingredients – mostly vegetables - that made him cringe just by setting his eyes on them.

He took a fry out of the package and ate it, unprepared for the sudden wave of heat that hit his tongue. He swallowed the offensive item as quickly as possible and took a large gulp of cola to cool his mouth down and stop the throbbing burn on his tongue. In front of him, he heard Misaki snicker with his mouth full, obviously understanding what had happened. Upon the murderous look Saruhiko sent his way, the redhead held his hands up in a defensive gesture.

“My burger’s pretty good!” Misaki said abruptly, stumbling on his words, almost like he’d been in a rush to change the atmosphere. Then, he grabbed some fries and ate them.

Saruhiko shrugged slightly and looked up at the other teen with a dull expression as he took a small bite of his cheeseburger. “Ah, is that so?”

“I’d offer you a bite like the nice guy I am, but I’ve seen the way you’re staring at the vegetables and I honestly feel bad for them.”

He clicked his tongue. “Who would put those weird strip things on a burger?”

“Those are red cabbage strips, idiot. And they’re good!”

Another look at the burger the redhead had been eating was enough to make his eyebrows turn up in mild disgust and Saruhiko remained quiet, tapping a finger on the table irritably.

“They’re gross.” he muttered in a low tone.

“You never even tried them!” Misaki argued, determined hazel eyes staring at him from across the table.

“I don’t need to try them to know they’re gross.”

“Fine, have it your way!” A loud huff left Misaki’s lips and he frowned, biting his hamburger with a newfound fierceness. “You’ll spoil your stomach with all the crap you eat, y’know that?”

He only had time to reply a brief “So what?” before his noisy friend started going off again.

“You’re always drinking stuff with carbonic acid! And you never eat anything that has vegetables on it unless you’re forced to! And when you’re on your own you keep skipping meals and live off stupid granola bars instead!”

Saruhiko’s hand tightened around his cola bottle. “What’s so wrong with that?”

Opposite from him, Misaki sighed in defeat. “Sometimes it’s really hard to get into that tough head of yours, y’know?” The redhead finished his burger and wiped his mouth, whereas Saruhiko had only eaten half of his.

_0 points_ , he thought to himself. Suddenly, he didn’t feel like eating anymore.

Misaki got up from the bench he’d been sitting on and grabbed their bill, muttering a quick “I’ll be back in a sec.” before disappearing among the sea of people still in line to get their food. Saruhiko watched him go, drinking the last bit of cola he still had left in the bottle. Now that he was alone he noticed how loud and obnoxious the environment was, there were some stupid songs playing in the background and people were talking excitedly without caring for who they were next to. He lifted up his gaze and looked at the other tables surrounding theirs. The restaurant that was usually frequented by a few students who dropped by to eat a quick meal after school was now full of couples having what seemed like romantic Christmas dinners of some sort and some loners here and there eating fried chicken, staring at the empty space in front of them with eyes so empty they almost looked like they were devoid of any life.

“Yo, I’m back!”

When Saruhiko looked up at Misaki, the former had a plate with a rather big slice of chocolate cake on it, holding two forks with his other hand. The redhead occupied the seat in front of him once again and set the plate on the table between the two of them.

“They offered a piece of cake with the menu I got for myself, so I had to go pick it up now.” Misaki explained. Then, Saruhiko blinked in surprise as one of the forks was held in his direction. He looked from the fork to Misaki’s face and caught the sparkle in the other teen’s eyes as he shuffled closer to the edge of his seat.

“There’s enough for the two of us to eat, so I asked them for two forks. This way we can eat together!” The redhead smiled and Saruhiko took the fork his best friend was offering him. “You like chocolate cake, right?”

“I do.” Saruhiko answered softly, and took a small piece of the cake slice with his fork. Misaki still hadn’t touched the dessert he’d brought, looking at him expectantly as if he needed permission to start eating. Saruhiko nodded at him and for the next few moments they were content just savoring the slice. It was as if the people around them didn’t exist anymore and their obnoxiously loud conversations became dimmer with each passing second, until they were nothing more than background noise Saruhiko’s brain didn’t bother picking up.

* * *

As they exited the fast food restaurant, Misaki placed a hand on his stomach and turned around to smile at him. The sky had become a lot darker while they were eating inside and the streets were now heavily illuminated with all kinds of Christmas lights. There were a lot less people walking around too, which Saruhiko was quite thankful for. At least they could walk side by side on the sidewalk now without accidentally bumping into someone. A bubble of laughter threatened to leave his lips as he remembered how Misaki had ran into the old lady earlier that day.

“I feel a lot better after eating that burger!” he heard Misaki say next to him, struggling with the sleeve of his coat as he tried to put it on. After wrapping the scarf Misaki had lent him around his neck, Saruhiko stepped forward to help the redhead, feeling a smile of his own stretch his cheeks. “I’m pretty sure the reason I couldn’t beat you earlier was because I was so hungry I couldn’t play properly!”

“Yeah, sure.” Saruhiko snorted. “Wasn’t it because I’m a lot better than you?”

Misaki seemed to ponder his answer for a few seconds, opting for a shrug of his shoulders and a content “I’m gonna win one of these days, you better be ready!”

_I'll be waiting for that_ , he thought to himself, tugging Misaki’s black beanie down to mess with him. The redhead struggled with it for a few seconds, calling him a bastard and hitting him in the arm when his eyes were freed from their temporary cover.

They didn’t seem to have a specific destination this time around, so Saruhiko looked around trying to guess where the redhead was taking him next. Suddenly, Misaki seemed to spot something that caught his attention, so he stopped walking and turned to him with a wide grin.

“Hey Saruhiko, wanna take a picture together?”

“What?”

“There” The redhead pointed to a certain kind of outdoors booth on the other side of the road that had the words ‘Free Christmas Instant Pictures’ printed in big letters on a banner stand to its right. Misaki took off and grabbed his wrist, pulling him along towards said booth.

When they got there, Saruhiko noticed there was only one person running the booth, a man wearing one of those typically ugly Christmas sweaters that looked too small on him. He was sitting on a stool, holding one of those professional instant cameras that appear on TV advertisements all the time. He was so focused on what he was doing that he didn’t look up at them at first. Misaki let go of his wrist and moved to stand directly in front of the man.

“You’re taking free pictures, right?”

The man finally spared them a glance, looking from one to the other with a questionable expression, as if they weren’t meant to be there. Saruhiko found that look slightly suspicious, but didn’t comment on it. The man got up from the stool he’d been sitting on, tugging his ugly sweater down, picked up a cardboard cutout frame and handed it to them, which Misaki took happily.

Saruhiko stared at the cardboard frame. It had a rectangular shape with a lot of space in the open middle so more than one person could hold it and fit inside for the picture. It was heavily decorated, and on the bottom part of it, ‘Merry Xmas’ stood out in big bold letters. Misaki extended the cardboard cutout frame in his direction and Saruhiko took it, holding on to his side of it with his right hand. The man came up to them then and told them where the picture would be taken, making some small adjustments here and there in terms of lighting and placing his instant camera on a tripod in front of them.

There was an awkward silence for a moment as both Saruhiko and Misaki waited for the man in the ugly sweater to take the picture. But after a while nothing really happened and he kept staring at the two of them, like he was waiting for something to happen.

“Are you two going to do it or what?” he asked.

The cold breeze that swept over them at that moment had Saruhiko shivering slightly and he looked at Misaki, his own doubt reflected in the other’s hazel orbs. The redhead shifted for a bit and Saruhiko tightened his hold on the cardboard cutout. “Do what?”

“Kiss.” the man answered with a huff - as if it had been obvious - eyes staring right at the top of the cardboard frame. Saruhiko instantly followed his gaze, Misaki repeating the motion beside him.

Hung above their heads and attached to the frame they were holding onto was a small spring of mistletoe. They were standing directly beneath it.

Saruhiko’s eyes widened in understanding of what they’d gotten themselves into, taking a double look at the banner stand a few feet away from him. Neither of them had read the small letters underneath the ‘Free Christmas Instant Pictures’, which indicated that it was an activity meant for couples who wanted to get their picture taken while kissing under the mistletoe.

When he looked back at Misaki, the former was blushing feverishly, trying to answer the man in front of them the best he could.

“W–wait, this isn’t — I mean, I–I didn’t —”

“Are you going to do it or not? I’m wasting my time here.” said the man, startling both boys.

Misaki looked back at him then, eyes questioning. Saruhiko didn’t know what to say, his own heart was beating too fast and he was pretty sure there was some sort of redness to his cheeks as well. For what seemed like the longest time, they just stared into each other’s eyes, too scared to do anything else, too scared to take a step forward and do what the man had asked them to. Saruhiko wondered what those lips would taste like on his, though. He’d never kissed anyone before - neither had been interested in doing so - but at that moment, with Misaki standing in front of him like that, the thought of their lips touching enticed something inside of him.

Oh, how he wanted it to happen.

Their faces had gotten considerably closer, as if they were unconsciously gravitating towards each other. Saruhiko could feel his heartbeat pounding in his ears as they got even closer and he could hear Misaki inhale strongly through his nostrils. He wondered if the redhead was feeling the same pressure inside his chest, the same annoying feeling of blood pulsing through his head and doing weird little swirls in his stomach. He wondered if Misaki felt the same attraction that seemed to pull them together. He wondered if this was some sort of disease of his. If it was, he hoped Misaki had caught it as well.

Just when he thought something was about to take place, there was a huge flash of white light surrounding them. It lasted for only a fraction of second but it was enough to snap them out of their daze. Misaki stepped back almost instantly and turned away from him, bringing his right arm up to scratch at the back of his head. Saruhiko stared back at him, disappointment settling itself in his chest. What had he been hoping for anyway? Why had his heart started beating with such intensity?

_Why isn’t Misaki saying anything?_

In the end, the man in the ugly Christmas sweater had given them the photo he took when they were about to do something neither of them had been too aware of. Misaki took the photo in his hands, accidentally crumbling it because of the way his trembling fingers were holding the item, and muttered a low “Thanks” as he stuffed it in one of his pockets, rushing off to the other side of the road without sparing a glance to the nearest traffic light.

Saruhiko followed after him, fixing the scarf around his neck as he ran before he got caught by any moving vehicle. When he reached the redhead he was panting slightly and had to support his hands on the nearest street lamp.

“What was that all about? You didn’t need to run off like that.” he commented while still trying to get a hold of his breathing. Misaki had his back turned towards him, so Saruhiko couldn’t see his face, but the redhead was fiddling with his hands - which meant he was still nervous about what had happened.

“I didn’t run off.” Misaki answered, in a low tone that didn’t quite fit him. “I–I just… can we not talk about that right now?”

Saruhiko shook some dirt off his pants and sighed. “Alright.”

Misaki turned around then, and though there was still a hint of uncertainty in his eyes, his face lightened up and he let out a small smile. “I think I know the perfect place for us to go next. Follow me!” the redhead said, motioning for him to come along. And even though there was a painful knot in his throat Saruhiko stepped forward and followed Misaki, like he always would.

Misaki hadn’t changed. Misaki was the same as always. And Saruhiko felt like an idiot for thinking that the other teen might have changed, that he might have caught that weird disease that pulled at his heartstrings.

_We didn’t get to do anything, after all._

And nothing had changed, nothing would change.

* * *

After walking quietly for what seemed like a long time - but had only probably been something close to twenty minutes - they reached an old building. It didn’t seem like anyone lived there, as all the lights were turned off and the place looked extremely dull and out of place among the other vivid illuminations, almost like something that was dead to the world and would fall apart at any given second.

His train of thought was interrupted when Misaki mumbled something in front of him that he didn’t quite get. When he looked up, the other teen was standing by the door of the old building, hand on its dusty handle. “We’re here.”

Saruhiko lifted one of his hands to adjust his glasses before following the redhead and entering the building with him. If the outside looked dull, the inside was even worse. They could barely see anything save for the bottom of the stairs that led to the upper floors because of the dim light coming from outside. Saruhiko stood quietly, still unsure of what their purpose there was. Next to him, Misaki took out his PDA and tried to use it as a light source, pointing the screen to the bottom of the stairs. It didn’t help much, but it was enough to prevent them from stumbling over whatever things they could find ahead of them so they moved forward and started climbing up the stairs.

There was another inconvenience in the building. Besides the nonexistent lighting, the amount of floors they had to go through before they got to wherever Misaki was taking them was absurd. Saruhiko was already tired of climbing so many stairs and started to lean slightly on the redhead for support, who was surprisingly very quiet. He suspected it was probably because Misaki was scared to be in such a dark environment for so long - that also explained why the other teen was reluctant to leave his side.

They got to the end of the stairs a few moments later. Misaki told him to hold his PDA and point it at the furthest wall. He complied and the shorter of the two took out a key that was hidden inside a broken flower pot, opening a door that Saruhiko hadn’t even noticed that was there. Once he was done, Misaki put the key in his coat’s front pocket and motioned for Saruhiko to follow him. The door led to another staircase - a much smaller one, thankfully - and though it was still dark, the redhead didn’t seem as frightened anymore.

“Hurry up!” he heard Misaki say, already a couple of steps ahead of him. Climbing up so many stairs really had been an exhausting effort, but the excitement in his companion’s voice enthralled itself in his ears and Saruhiko found himself running the last couple of stairs so he could catch up. Misaki looked back at him once they reached the last stair - a larger one where both of them could fit at the same time - and opened the door that led to the rooftop of the old building. The air was even colder at such a high altitude and Saruhiko decided to slide his exposed hands inside his jacket pockets to retain some warmth, white swells of misty air leaving his lips as he exhaled.

“What do you think Saruhiko? Brings back some memories, right?”

Saruhiko looked at the space around them and noticed the crippling familiarity of it. He could still picture the huge blimp that appeared before his eyes, its size so big it filled out his complete visual field, and the enormous amount of feelings gushing out of him in bits at the sight.

_Maybe if we had gotten onto it, would something have changed?_

That question had haunted him a lot that day. The crushing reality of the world they lived in - the world he lived in - was so vivid and menacing that the image of the blimp had engraved its own existence into his body. The idea of jumping off into the unknown object, of throwing everything he had and pursuing a new life, away from all of the things he knew, had him dumbstruck, and he couldn’t contain that cried plea for help that left his lips so fluidly, as if it was a soft whisper, a wish blown into the night.

But the blimp had been gone without an answer. And this wasn’t the same roof they’d been on that day, roughly two years ago.

Saruhiko clicked his tongue and stepped forward without glancing at Misaki, who stood a few feet away from him still waiting for an answer. He settled for sitting at the edge of the rooftop with his legs dangling freely, hands clasped around the metal bars that prevented him from falling who knows how many feet onto the concrete of the road at the far end. It didn’t take long for Misaki to follow and stand next to him, gaze placed in the horizon of lights that was shown in front of them, countless buildings heavily illuminated because of the holiday season.

Misaki started talking, voice bubbly and vibrant, about how pretty the buildings and the streets looked like that, and how lucky they were to witness such a thing.

“If we had gotten on the blimp that day, maybe we wouldn’t be standing on this rooftop right now.” the redhead said, a strong sense of conviction marking his words. “But I’m here with you. That should be the only thing that matters, right?”

Saruhiko looked up at that and when their eyes met, the spark in Misaki’s hazel orbs shot through him and struck his core so deeply that he felt himself shiver slightly, hands tightening against the metal bars. And when Misaki smiled, Saruhiko thought he shined brighter than all the Christmas lights that adorned the buildings and the streets below them.

_100 points_ , he thought to himself. His chest was filled with warmth and there was something tight embracing his heart that he wasn’t able to identify, though he had a small clue of what it might represent.

Saruhiko drew back his head a bit and turned it upwards to look at the starry sky above them before closing his eyes, unable to stop the small smile that crept its way onto his lips. He never thought he’d get such a spot on answer to that question that rose within himself when they were younger. The fact that Yata Misaki could be so unpredictable fascinated him, stole his breath away even, in a way nothing or no one else had done before in his entire life. Despite being dumb and thick-headed, the redhead was the only one able to come up with 100 points answers, the only one capable of reaching the depths of Saruhiko’s mind, even if only a reduced number of times.

Tiny snowflakes started falling on his face and he finally answered Misaki’s question. “Right.”

The air became silent between them as the other teen settled down on the floor as well, back against the metal bars. Saruhiko wiped some melting snow off his face and watched as more tiny snowflakes drifted onto his black jean pants. His hands had gotten significantly colder so he blew into them, trying to at least heat them up a little, to no avail. When he took notice of Misaki again, the redhead was staring at him intently. Immediately after the older of the two noticed he’d been caught, his body jerked slightly and he hit the metal bars with his elbow, letting out a small whimper of pain. A few seconds later he looked up at him again and the words “… Your hands.” left his lips in a low, almost hesitant, tone.

Saruhiko’s brows furrowed in confusion. “What?”

“Your hands.”

“What about my hands?”

“Just let me see them.”

He extended his hands in Misaki’s direction, wondering what the latter intended to do. Misaki looked away for a moment, fidgeting, and then placed his own hands on top of Saruhiko’s very carefully, as if he’d been scared of breaking something with his feather-like touch. Saruhiko’s fingers twitched at the warm contact and he couldn’t take his eyes off of their joined hands. He felt his heartbeat increase in a matter of seconds and he almost choked with his own breath, having to inevitably cough a couple of times. Misaki hadn’t done anything with his hands in the meantime but upon looking at him Saruhiko noticed his eyes were wide open and there was a growing shade of red coloring his cheeks, as if he’d been momentarily shocked by his own actions.

The older of the two opened his mouth once and closed it again without saying a word. A few moments later, he muttered something under his breath that Saruhiko almost didn’t hear. “Your hands are cold. That’s why.”

Misaki gave Saruhiko’s hands a tiny squeeze and moved so he could sit closer to him. There were still snowflakes falling from above and Saruhiko noticed the other teen’s black beanie had various white dots all around. His own hair must’ve been covered with snow as well, as some of it fell down his face to land on his thighs. Saruhiko tentatively adjusted his hands against Misaki’s so they’d fit better together and at that, Misaki firmly locked their fingers and smiled at him.

His cheeks grew hotter despite the cold snow hitting his skin and Saruhiko wondered if there was something he could say so the other teen wouldn’t let go of his hands. He wished they could stay in that rooftop for as long as the world allowed them to.

“T-Thank… you…” The words left him without his actual consent. Saruhiko didn’t know what exactly he was thanking Misaki for. At first it would seem like he was referring to the much wanted warmth and the feeling of the redhead’s hands on his, but it had been more than that. It hadn’t only been the scarf wrapped around his neck, the shared cake or the feeling of enjoinment as they played games together. It had been the way his whole body felt lighter, the fact that he hadn’t spent another day curled up on a random corner of the internet café. It had been the fact that he felt at peace with himself in moments like these, moments that belonged only to the two of them, as if there was a piece of the world that no one else could witness but them.

Misaki let out a cheerful “You’re welcome.” as a tiny snowflake fell on his nose and he laughed slightly, hazel eyes shining like stars.

_We’ll take that piece of this shitty place and create a small world of our own_ , Saruhiko thought. Oh, how it would be nice.

* * *

Saruhiko breathed heavily as he tried to regain some composure. After spending a long time on the rooftop talking about trivial things and looking up at the starry sky above them with their hands still connected, there was a sudden alarm tune that Misaki had instantly recognized as belonging to his PDA. The redhead’s eyes widened and he got up abruptly, explaining that it was getting pretty late already and his mom would be mad if he didn’t get home within the next hour. Saruhiko clicked his tongue at the loss of warmth in his hands as he too got up and both boys ran the whole way down the building, almost falling over a few times on the stairs. Once outside they had to stop and lean against the door they’d used to get out, taking sharp intakes of air to calm the adrenaline rushing freely through their bodies. Saruhiko adjusted his glasses and gripped his backpack with his right hand so it wouldn’t fall over and hit the icy pavement.

“Let’s go!” Misaki said. They started to walk back to the internet café near the bus stop, where their journey had started, at a faster pace, hands stuffed in their pockets as more bits of snow fell from the sky.

The redhead was a couple of feet ahead of him, sparing a few glances back from time to time to make sure Saruhiko was still following right behind. Watching Misaki’s back as they walked silently made him think of the time they spent together that day and his mind drifted to a particular event. He could still imagine the stupid string of mistletoe above their heads and the way their faces had gotten closer. Even though the matter had been dropped right after by Misaki’s request, there was a nagging part inside his brain that still insisted in wondering what could have happened if they hadn’t been startled by the flash of the instant camera. Saruhiko shook his head and cleared his throat, trying to simmer down the troublesome train of thoughts wandering in his head.

“…Misaki.” Saruhiko didn’t even quite realize he’d said the name out loud until he heard his own voice. The redhead turned around instantly and slowed his pace so they could walk side by side, shuffling closer to him.

“What is it?”

The air felt stale around him all of a sudden and it was hard to breathe, but Saruhiko figured he’d be making a fool out of himself if he didn’t force the rest of the words out, so he did. “When we were in that booth under the stupid twig… why didn’t you do anything?”

Misaki visibly stiffened next to him and Saruhiko drew back his head a bit, frowning. That reaction was to be expected, so why did he even bother asking?

_Stupid_ , his own voice mocked him and he lowered his gaze to the ground between them, where small droplets of water started wetting the pavement, replacing the snow that had stopped falling some moments after they left the old abandoned building.

“Wha— you mean the mistletoe?” the other teen replied, laughing nervously. “Were you expecting me to do anything?”

Saruhiko let out a faint breath and watched as the misty air turned white, only to fall prey to its unavoidable fate of fading until it couldn’t be seen any longer. The random droplets of rain hitting his body had become more frequent and would soon give place to another downpour like the one they were lucky to have missed that afternoon, so he tugged his jacket’s hood up to cover his hair. “It’s nothing, forget about it.”

His voice sounded somehow hollow and though he’d hoped for some sort of retaliation from the boy next to him, Misaki remained quiet. The only sound Saruhiko’s ears picked up was the one caused by the raindrops as they hit everything they could reach, almost like a soft melody drenched in sorrow that everyone else outside tried to avoid, walking at a fast pace with their umbrellas open to escape the wet environment.

Feeling cold and wet really was an awful combination.

There was a rustle of cloth and the scrape of shoes on pavement as Misaki held his yellow coat over his head to cover himself from the rain as well. Saruhiko looked over at him - the redhead was completely drenched, water dripping from his hair, and he had his gaze set ahead of him at a far off point of the sidewalk. Saruhiko couldn’t really tell what was on his mind, but he didn’t bother asking - such a thing had been proved worthless with his last attempt.

“Are you gonna spend the night at that stupid net café?”

The question had been unexpected and Saruhiko blinked repeatedly as a stray droplet of water hit him in his left eye. “Yeah.”

“You don’t have to. I mean, you could come home with me and sleep over at my place. I’m sure my mom and my stepdad wouldn’t mind.”

Saruhiko shook his head. “It’s fine.”

Misaki’s head turned around suddenly in a swift motion, his expression serious, and he gazed at Saruhiko with narrowed eyes. “No, it’s not. You shouldn’t have to spend your night in a place like that!” His voice was low and heavy and it was filled with such certainty that it made Saruhiko stiffen in surprise.

“I told you it’s fine. I don’t care.”

Hazel eyes locked with his, and it was as if the connection was burning him. Saruhiko stuffed his hands in his jacket pockets and looked away as more rain fell upon the two. He knew Misaki was clearly upset with his answer - though he hadn’t talked back to him yet - but there really wasn’t anything that could be done, it was already too late. The café appeared in his field of vision as if to prove him right and both of them hurried to find some temporary shelter at the top of the stairs that led to its entrance, where water couldn’t reach them anymore. Saruhiko let his hood fall back and ran a hand through his wet hair, staring down at Misaki who was busy adjusting his coat. The two of them were soaked to the bone and the rain gave no signs of stopping anytime soon.

“So I guess this is it?” Misaki asked, looking at the inside of the internet café through the glass door with a doubtful expression.

Saruhiko nodded, taking of his glasses and wiping them on his shirt. “I guess so.” he replied blandly.

The older teen took a step closer to him and muttered a soft “Goodbye, I’ll text you once I get home.” with a strained smile on his lips. The fake smile looked extremely out of place in Misaki’s face and Saruhiko felt his throat tighten at the sight.

“Goodbye.”

With that, Misaki took a deep breath and shook some more water from his hair. He covered his head with the coat once again and walked down the stairs and into the never faltering rain, running over to where he’d left his bicycle right next to the bus stop. Saruhiko watched him go, disappointment washing his body in waves as he blamed himself for ruining the end of their day together. His right hand came up and squeezed his left arm with a bit more strength than intended. There was a sharp voice in his head mocking him and laughing at another ruined Christmas.

_And this time, it was all your fault_.

He shook his head to get rid of the annoying voice, but the gesture only managed to make him slightly dizzy, and his grip on his left arm got stronger. There was nothing he could do now to fix things, so the best he could do was endure whatever was left of the night.

There was a sharp sound coming from behind him as he got ready to enter the café. Saruhiko ignored it - it had probably only been some sort of stray cat anyway - and gripped the door’s handle to open it and escape the biting cold temperatures outside.

“Wait!”

Saruhiko’s eyes flashed open and he turned around with a jerk, breathing hard. Misaki was there, only a couple of feet away from him, and he had dropped his bicycle, running towards the internet café again in the middle of the rain. Saruhiko was frozen where he stood, hand still gripping the glass door behind him. The redhead hurried up the stairs to meet him and once they were facing each other, Saruhiko noticed he was breathing hard, brows set and lips trembling.

“What are you-” he started, but was unable to finish his question when he felt Misaki take a few rushed steps in his direction, closing the distance between them so quickly Saruhiko hadn’t even gotten the time to blink. Misaki was close - so close he couldn’t even see his face properly anymore. Everything was a blur as their breaths came together and Saruhiko felt like his heart would jump out of his chest. There was a moment’s hesitation as their noses bumped against each other and the air around them seemed to have grown still, though the steady patter of the rain could still be heard in the background. It didn’t take much longer for Misaki to bring one of his hands up to cup Saruhiko’s cheek and, closing his eyes, he pressed their lips together.

It felt like Saruhiko’s breath had been stolen away and he almost ended up stumbling backwards into the glass door at his back, legs trembling with the effort of holding himself up. They remained that way for a long moment before Misaki finally stepped back, eyes dancing as Saruhiko stood motionless, a definite spark of warmth heating his usually cold cheeks.

That had been a kiss, right?

Misaki smiled up at him. “Merry Christmas, Saruhiko.”

Before he could say anything, the redhead was already clumsily walking down the stairs, wasting no time in picking up his abandoned bicycle. He turned around one last time to wave him goodbye before he started pedaling and disappeared from his line of sight.

Saruhiko shook his head and brought a hand to his lips, smiling sheepishly as he opened the glass door and stepped forward towards the inside of the internet café. He returned to his spot at the far end of the café, next to the man in the tight suit that was now sleeping soundly with a string of saliva falling down from the corner of his mouth. Disgusted, he took his seat on the reclining chair that had been saved for him when he exited the establishment earlier that day. One of the noisy staff members brought him a towel for him to dry his wet hair and he took it, fishing his PDA out of his backpack to open the mailing app he’d made for him and Misaki to use. Pressing his thumb rapidly over the screen, he typed a message.

<You forgot your scarf, idiot.>

Misaki’s reply came a couple of minutes later. <That only means we’ll have to meet up tomorrow so you can give it back :-)>

It was strange, but somehow Saruhiko felt like his opinion on Christmas had become a little better.

**Author's Note:**

> a friend of mine (galacticlycoris on twitter) drew fanart for this fic, i'm so happy and honored! :'D  
> go check it out!! >https://twitter.com/galacticlycoris/status/682127788896333824


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